Rocky

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I've never thought Chris Rock was funny, and nothing I've seen on tonight's Oscarcast changed my mind. The man was too loud, enunciated poorly, and simply missed the mark with his material. I didn't laugh. The great thing about Billy Crystal is that the man exudes love for the movies and the industry, and that love is infectuous. Chris Rock is merely an abrasive, mugging outsider, horribly miscast for the job.

But that seems par for the course for this Oscarcast. The opening montage was utterly horrendous, lacking any kind of rhythm, thematic unity, or craftsmanship-- it looked like it was slapped together by a teenager with a Powerbook. The musical themes used to play people on and off included some baffling choices-- the themes from The Terminator and Star Trek: The Motion Picture among them. The idea of giving some awards from the auditorium floor was ill-conceived from the start. And what's the deal with Beyonce? Did she give 'em a bulk rate or something?

At least The Incredibles beat the two Dreamworks films for best animated picture.

9 Comments

Easily the worst produced and directed oscar telecast I've ever seen. People were given so little time and rushed through in order to what? Make an 8:40 pst deadline? So that the could get to? Totally ruined much chance of any human moments. And you're right, the choices the producers made were laughably bad. I hope several people get fired for this show, and maybe a little tarring and feathering isn't out of order.

At least the voters were given less crack cocaine this year than normal (and the screenwriter voters hit it on the head as usual).

Despite the fact that I think Chris Rock is one of the funniest comedians out there, I still agree that he was miscast for this job. The Oscar audience needs gentle teasing (Billy Crystal) not outright insults -- if I'd been Jude Law or Colin Farrell I'd have been a little ticked.

The timing did seem way off. At least twice I caught stage hands running off the stage when the show came back from commercial. And then there was the guy handing Chris Rock the microphone and then zipping backstage. What was that all about?

Giving awards from the auditorium floor was a horrible idea. It reeked of amateurism and the occasional pitfalls of trying too hard to think "out of the box." Cars have four wheels, not three. Coffee goes on the inside of the cup, not the outside. Some things don't need to be changed.

At least Leonardo DiCaprio didn't win Best Actor. I thought he was brilliant early in his career. But ever since Titanic, every time I watch him he comes off as an over eager high school thespian.

Can you explain your Beyonce comments? I FF'd through her performance. The only thing I caught was Prince looking mildly perturbed at the two gentlemen who stood up to applaud after her song.

I think that Chris Rock gets the job because the producers think that it would bring in people like me who couldn't care less about the Oscars. It didn't work. I still didn't watch. Can't avoid hearing about the results, though.

Stephen: You must have been hitting that fast-forward button pretty heavily to miss Beyonce, who had not one but THREE performances. She sang the songs from Phantom of the Opera, The Chorus, and The Polar Express. Apparently the producers got her during her buy two get one free sale.

Yep, I fast-forwarded through all the songs. Well, except Yo-Yo Ma's haunting cello performance during the tribute segment.

I, too, found myself saying "The theme to Star Trek? Wha -?!"

Word to Peter! You nailed everything that bothered me about the Oscars, except the cattle call of having the nominees come up on the stage. Then, not even showing their faces as their names were read. It was like some misbegotten version of "throwing the bouquet" at a wedding - I thought maybe they'd all rush forward to see who could get to the statuette first.

Chris Rock? Not so hot. The Oscars are a big self-love fest by, for and about movies and movie people. They shouldn't have a host who mocks the industry, and the *emphatically* shouldn't have a host who mocks individual actors, by name.

And Beyonce? Well, for someone who doesn't "get" American Idol (because most of the contestants, even the winners, wouldn't be people whose albums I would want to buy, with the possible exception of Fantasia)...I don't "get" Beyonce either. She's got an OK voice, and she's OK pretty. Beautiful eyes, in fact (legs kinda dumpy though). But I digress. I *don't* want to see her three times during the Oscar telecast. For the song from the French movie, why not bring over the original kid from the film - the one with the face *and* voice of an angel? Unless his voice has cracked in the meantime.

And her French accent? Ugh. I speak French, and I couldn't understand a word she was singing!

Gotta say, Annette Bening looked mighty pissed when Hillary Swank was announced again as the winner. I didn't see Bening's performance, *did* see "Million Dollar Baby" and it was *not* the best picture of the year, not even close. Complaining about what was wrong with that picture, though, is for another thread.

can't speak for terminator, but they probably played trek music to honor jerry goldsmith who died in 2004. he composed many trek pieces and well know movie themes as well as the theme from the oscars themselves.

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